Here is a simple list of do's and don'ts to ensure that your endeavors to become the guy at the hostel that all the girls love and all the guys hate.
Beware - side effects may include genital rash, intense feelings of riteousness and an accute case of regular beatings when your peers realize how much of a knob you really are.
Enjoy!
Do: Have your high street boutique hairdresser fashion a 'gnarly' set of dreadlocks complete with novelty beads even though you are not a Rastafarian nor have you visited the Caribbean or Ethiopia. Make sure you tell everybody that you meet that you have however.
Don't: Visit any site on your travels that does not have deep spiritual symbolism, or if you must attend you may do so providing that you mock every person who also visits the site and ensure that you let everybody know that you are there under duress and that you are on an entirely different spiritual level to them.
Do: Exaggerate your experiences at hostels to impress other like minded douchebags. Eg. If mummy and daddy paid for you to take a luxury group tour through Kenya and Tanzania and you spent one morning gawking at a group of Masai warriors, tell your fellow travellers that you spent two weeks in a Masai camp, hunted and ate wild animals (even though you are a vegan), received a nose piercing from the chief of the tribe (which you in fact had done at the high street beautician) and any other equally impressive tale that would make the female hostel dwellers gasp in admiration.
Don't: wear any less than 14 friendship bracelets at one time that you have collected from the village members of remote communities you have visited along your journeys (you know the tie up ones that the villagers ship in from China by the boxload to sell to tourists at a heavily inflated price?)
Extra credit if you provide everyone with an excessively embellished story of how an elder gave you one after cleansing your soul of your sins in a past life (I.e. a sacreligious act like eating a McDonalds cheeseburger).
Do: ensure that you have a glorious tan that has supposedly come from the last 12 months of trekking mountains and jungles and not from a tanning salon (which is actually a higher probability).
Don't: let anybody else you meet on your travels be more 'far out' than you, even if it means fabricating or exaggerating circumstances around your previous travel experiences.
Do: shag girls that you have picked up under false pretenses, in a multi bed hostel room to ensure that other travellers are well aware that you are all about 'spiritual love connections' and the spreading of STDs that you caught from that questionable Thai girl that you hooked up with on your journey through Chiang Mai.
Radness!!
Peace, love and all that shit.